Barry Taylor is an artist, poet, theologian, cultural muser and has become a dear friend the past year or so. He sits uncomfortably as the associate rector at All Saints Episcopal Church in Beverly Hills California. I say uncomfortably because Barry occupies thought and presence at the outer edges of Christianity, caring little for polishing the relics of orthodoxy while somehow en-living its very intent. He dwells in the hyphenated reality (christian-agnostic-eastern-western-poet-artist-mystic-materialist...)more comfortably than anyone I know. This poem came from a homily where he was reflecting on John 1:29-49.
"There he stood, pointing, pointing
day after day after day
and only sinners came
unwashed to be washed clean
then one day he pointed, hand trembling
gaze fixed on one he saw
pushing us away in his direction
he bid us go, go
and there we stood, wondering, wondering and glancing back and forth and back again we began to walk hesitant, hopeful, eager, afraid we picked up the pace with one last look we saw john turn his back and we were gone, gone
the one before us stopped, stopped
and watched, and watched us approach
caught between our past
and who knows what
then he asked “why?”
we looked at him like children
both of us said “you”
and he said “come, come”
- Mike Mercer
The spiritual path is caught between our past and who knows what's next. That space of uncertainty, the lack of confidence, our disorientation, the 'not-knowing' is the space where we learn to be human. Yet our hands grasp for certainty and assurances, the two things that life will not offer and so we are apt to fashion these with our own hands. Lesser gods that become the gravitational pull of our life. Yet still a Solicitation occurs that will not be extinguished, "go to the limits of your longings...flare up like flame and make big shadows I can move in, let everything happen to you.."(Rilke) There is something irreducible that continues to call us into the depth of our own humanity, longing and life.
